Thursday, 28 August 2014

BECAUSE I AM A MEN

Early Morning, I wake-up with a sense of HAPPINESS. Why ? I don't have any answer but there are moment when I feel happy or relaex without any reason. With a cup of tea I start think when was the last time when I felt relaxed. After sometime I start think what was the HAPPIEST moment of my LIFE.

39 Year back I was born as MALE in my family, after two FEMALES. Probably that was the first day when I was HAPPY enough. Why ? I don't know may be because of chearing sounds from outside or may be because of the sound of metals plates.

(In north India when any male took birth its common to create metal sound, why the sound, it probably related to war, in old time this was used as information that one more PROTECTOR/YODHA has born)

Reason can be any, but that was my HAPPIEST day. I can't comment on my sisters birth, probably that was their happiest moment, but no comment or may be some other time.

What happen after that ? Why I called the day as HAPPIEST day ? Does that mean rest of LIFE was DOOMED ? No there are thausands of moment when I feel happy but today when i think about past I found the moment as the HAPPIEST moment. There are many reason behind that.

After Birth a couple of year just passed without any motive ... probably there was no motive or I was not enough inteligent to understand the responsiblities waiting for me. One good day I joined a school nearby. It was nearby still too far, I was not intrested still I was forced by love and bribe to sit and study.

Only one person can be luck to get top position in class and I was born with enough luck. Well those were the day when I was having option either to play with friends or to study to stay on first position in class. I choose to study. Why ? There can be many answer but today I feel there was a deep rooted sense that I have to earn for my family and for that I need to perform good during education. I know its not good but its BITTER TRUTH of Indian society where the earning responsiblity is on MALE CHILDS.

Next 20 year When I was busy with my books, time was slipping from hand like sand. Suddenly I reallize that education is over now time to search a decent Job, which not only fulfill my family requirements but also can satisfy me and my hobies. Luck again smile on me and I was blessed with a job within one year. Although the job was enough for me and my family also it was enough to satisfy my hobies/nature. But the one year time period teach me only one thing I should not bother about my hobies but I should be focused on the needs of family.

I could not say it was my golden period but I was not bad either. Many time neighbours use my name in examples to teach their own kids. Today I think was that good .. .if one kids become like me can that be good or parents let their kids grow in their own shell ? 

Almost everyone was happy with me. One day suddenly entire socity was standing against me. Everyone was thinking as I was a BORN CRIMINAL. Why ? Why they forget that they used my name as example for their kids ? Where was that IDEA person ? What wa reality the IDEA MEN or the BORN CRIMINAL ? I never find answer.

Time is good teacher and time teach me my leason in hard way, but in time. Today I can say The only HAPPIEST moment of my life was the moment when i took birth, rest of my life I was working for one and only one task to FEED my family. This is not natural but this is expected by my society. The only moment when I live without expection was just after birth and the HAPPIEST MOMENT. 

Rest of the life I wasted because I am MEN.






---
Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
www.daman4men.in

Wednesday, 27 August 2014

CONVERSATION 0002 : DISAPPEARING GIRLS


CONVERSATION 0002 :-- This conversation happen just a couple of days back in a car while driving to my farm with my one and only one relative.  It based on real incident just name place and language is changed.

Characters : Mr. G & Mrs. X




X : Its bad time, Girls are disappearing.
     (Jamana Kharab hai ladkiyan khade khade gayab ho jati hain).

G : Where ?
      (Khan par ?).


X : In India.
     (Yhin par).

G : How many you have seen in last 64 year ?
      (Apni puri umar main kitno ko gayab hote dekha hai ? She is 64 year old.)

X : Noone.
     (koi bhi nhin).

G : Then how you can say girls are disappearing ?

X : It is in media daily.
     (Paper main roj aata hai)

G : 4 year back in 2010, there was a news in paper saying one scientish throw her wife out of house. What do u say about that news ?

X : That was false, the day it claimed we were not even in city.

G : Then how you can say rest of the news are not FALSE ?

X : (PIN DROP)

G : Next time before claiming anything will you please check the facts.

X : (PIN DROP)














---
Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
www.daman4men.in

Monday, 25 August 2014

CONVERSATION 0001

CONVERSATION 0001 :-- This conversation happen just a couple of days back in a bus during short journey.  It based on real incident just name place and language is changed.

Characters : Mr. X, Ms. Y & Mr. G



X to G : Can you please give your seat to Ms. Y.

G to X : Why not.

G to Y : Are u sick ?

Y to G : No. Why ?

G to Y : Are you 50 year old ?

Y to G : Shut up ... can not you see I am young

G to X : Hey Mr. X you are not fit for the generation. From past many years females demanding equality ... . .but people like you are forcing them to feel special ... . today females want to strugle but people like you not allowing. AM i right Ms.Y.

Y to G : Ya its right.

G to Y : Then what are you waiting for just go back and stand like everyone else. See there is somespace go now.





---
Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
www.daman4men.in

WHY MEDIA IS BIASED AGAINST MALE ?

WHY MEDIA IS BIASED AGAINST MALE ?

Many times we saw news about crime against men on some news channel, but it never highlighted. Its just background news when some panel discussing crime against women. No-one really notice such news.


Why ?

Most of media channel and print media head are male, still news about male is in background why ?

Is it because they hate same gender or they love opposite gender ?

There may be thousands reason behind but today I witnessed one incident which I would like to share.

This article in not to discuss about media but its just my experience :

9.15 AM Canteen :: As usual I was taking breakfast with friends and one of them was reading news paper. The front page news was about an AIRPORT in vishakapatnam, A.P. The same news is on front page from past 4 or 5 days. An unusual comment by friend : these media people are fools they are giving same news from past many days. I am getting bored by reading same news from past few days.

There is nothing special in this conversation its obvious after telangana, rest of A.P. has to be taken care and an airport may be useful (although vizag already has one, but it may be extended).

There is nothing special about this news but still i was thinking why one person get bored when reading one news everyday, but the same person get excited when discuss or read a news about rape or sexual hrashment almost everyday.

Few month back in vizag when a lady complain about harassment by shop keeper, the news was in almost every paper for more then a week continuously (finally it was found false). That time no-one get bored topic was in hot discussion almost everyday. Nirbhaya was in papers almost everyday for few months and no-one get bored. But a simple news can be boaring if published 2 or 3 times. Badayu Rape Kand was in paper almost every day for more then a month. There are many example where crime against women reported many days and no-one get bored reading same.

WHY ?

Is there any problem with our mind ? 

Is our mind programmed to behave like this ? 

Who program mind to be anti-male ? 

Who is really responsible ?

Still searching how the programming can be changed effectively.






Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
gursharn76@gmail.com
www.daman4men.in


Wednesday, 20 August 2014

RAGA 001 : THE CONTRACTOR - VIRAT


RAGA



  1. INTRODUCTION
  2. THE CONTRACTOR - VIRAT
  3. THE LAWYER
  4.  THE KING
  5.  ______
  6.  ______
  7.  ______


1. INTRODUCTION

SARA the capital of SARA kingdom, the biggest city in north hills, beautiful and naturally rich also. Year 2014, All is not well. Many people involved in crime and many innocents getting punishment, even the king himself is not clean. Sara has a clear definition of crime and its punishment but because of unaware society, judiciary and police it is almost impossible to get justice. It was not always like that long time ago sara was the kingdom well known for its law and implementation, Justice was for everyone at any cost.


A powerful men vikram is king of sara. From past 3000 years vikram and his family rule the kingdom. His family's god is a giant snake RAGA, who believed to be lived 3000 year back in the kingdom. Citizens also believe in RAGA they consider him as their protector of their rights and still the snake protect them. In living memory no-one has seen RAGA, but they believe RAGA stil live in the hole on the top of the hill, which can be seen from the center of city. Many claim they have seen a giant snake, a few claim an old men in hole, but only god knows what they have seen really. People discuss about the existence of old men and snake but no-one was brave enough to reach the hole and check himself, because rumour was no-one came back from hole. The truth was many tried to reach but because of difficult path it was almost impossible to reach the top.



2. THE CONTRACTOR - VIRAT

Virat is a richest contractor in sara kingdom. He has personal relation with king vikram. Two year back when he was constructing a bridge, it collapse. From that day he is accused and not allowed to take any govt contract until he get cleared by court. He is fighting a long legal betel.


It is 3rd of September 2014, virat is waiting an old friend in his office. Today morning when he wake-up, he get massage from friend about the meeting. Friend came on time, it was casual meeting but from meeting virat came to know that govt is going to advertise for the biggest tender in past 50 years.


Viract think it is time to move, he can't afford to loose this one. He decided to use his political links. Soon he was sitting with king vikram. Result was promising, although he need to pay huge amount but he may get clearance before he can think of and he was happy. From the day everything changed, before the end of September not only court finalized the entire procedure but also clear him from all charges.


He was free to get tender. Before new beginning he throw a party at his own house, large number of people from political party, judiciary and from his friend circle came their to wish him luck. Late night he entered in his room. He didn't bother to switch on, he just went to bed and sleep. Next morning when his PA came he find him sleeping. It was surprising because virat never sleep after sun rise, also virat himself called this meeting. PA entered in his room. Virat can be seen sleeping on his own bad. Soon PA realize something went wrong he called doctor, who declared him dead.


Virat was found dead in his bad, day after virat was cleared from charges. It was a shocking incident for many. Police officers are working hard to find the reason, soon they noticed a wooden plate near to his bad, having a picture of snake and with text ”RAGA – hero don't live they rise”


Virat is murdered by some unknown who call himself raga was highlight that day. But actually who is raga no-one knows. Even police was not able to find any clue. Some claim their protector RAGA returned back, but they don't have any explanation for the real incident. King vikram was confused one side he was thinking RAGA is their GOD but the same time he was not able to find why their GOD killed him. Their could be thousands suspects but there was no way to find real one, soon case was closed.


The day virat was found dead, a small kid when he was playing, witness an old men on top of hill. The old man was looking toward city from the front of hole. The kid called his parents, his parents called neighbours, soon hundreds of people gather there, still the old man was watching toward city. Soon king vikram also came. It continue for hours. Probably in living memory this was first time when so many people witness the old men. King was trying to relate this incident with virat's murder without any explanation.


Soon everyone forget virat but they remember RAGA.


CONTINUE .....




Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
gursharn76@gmail.com
www.daman4men.in


Monday, 11 August 2014

DO I REALLY UNDERSTAND SCIENCE, LAW AND SOCIETY BEHIND RAPE ? PART 02 -- 16 YEAR BOY & 16 YEAR GIRL

From History as well as from society we all know girls get married in an age lesser then boys. Question rise WHY ?

The question can't be answered from social or economical understanding. There must be something which we may or may not understand well, but there must be a strong and scientific reason. A number of scientific experiments already has been done. Let us consider one of them.

Get two female age 10 and 22 and two male age 14 and 30. Ask them to sit silently and watch their reaction. Its simple experiment and everyone know the answer.
  1. There is little difference in 22 year old female and 30 year male
  2. A Drastic change can be observed in 10 year old female and 14 year old male.

Where from this difference comes ? Is there any difference in mind structure ? Is that possible female mind has different shape then male mind ? No as per science Male & Female both have similar structure. Still there is difference, the difference can be understood  from mind development study.

Recent study from HARVARD UNIVERSITY MEDICAL SCHOOL reveal that the difference between the brains of adult women and adult women are minor but the difference between girls compare to boys are dramatic.

A similar study by NICKELODEON, UK reveals that men has 11 year lag behind women when it comes to maturity. According to the study the average man doesn't reach full emotional maturity until age 43, while women mature by age 32.

There are many more study available and all confirm that men reach the maturity age after women. There can be dispute in lag period but there can't be any dispute regarding the fact that FEMALE GET MATURITY BEFORE MALE.

The NIH/NIMH study, entitled "Sexual dimorphism of brain developmental trajectories during childhood and adolescence," is printed by Elsevier from the journal NEUROIMAGE, volume 36, number 4, pages 1065-1073, July 15 2007.

Figure below, from the NIH study, shows trajectories of brain development in girls (red line) and boys (blue line), with 95% confidence intervals above and below each line.  The arrow indicates the “inflection point,” roughly the halfway point in brain development. Girls reach the inflection point just before age 11 years; boys do not reach the inflection point until just before age 15 years. A young woman reaches full maturity, in terms of brain development, between 21 and 22 years of age. A young man does not reach full maturity, in terms of brain development, until nearly 30 years of age.



All scientific study shows that female has similar level of development in mind as male, but before them. Now a couple of simple question rise :

(1) 16 year old  girl has physical relation with 16 year old boy. Here the boy is termed as rapist. Why ? Science tell us at this time male is not mature but female is mature enough. Then who is real RAPIST ?

(2) 25 year old female, has relation with 25 year old male. Here male is arrested and termed as RAPIST. Study shows female is mature then male. Why did she entered in physical relation ? Why she was not able to see the side effects ? Why she can't take responsibilities of her own action ?

Our LAW is biased against male. But it is never too late for correcting the mistakes. We need to amend law to build parity with science. Until law is formed based on science Justice can't be served.


Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
www.daman4men.in
gursharn76@gmail.com

Sunday, 10 August 2014

RAKSHABANDAN is threat on EQUALITY


10-Aug-2014, Its rakshabandan today. Should I say Happy Rakshabandan ? From dead memories, I can recall an incident from available history.

Rani Karnavati took up the regency in the name of her elder son Vikramjeet, a weak ruler. In the meantime, Mewar was attacked for the second time by Bahadur Shah of Gujarat, at whose hands Vikramjeet had earlier received an defeat. It was a matter of great concern for Rani. The antagonized nobles were not ready to fight for Vikramjeet and the imminent battle was sure to be another blot in the history of Sisodias. Rani Karnavati wrote to the nobles to come forward for the sake of the honour of the Sisodias, and was able to persuade the nobles to fight for Mewar, if not for Vikramjeet. Their sole condition was that Vikramjeet and Uday Singh should go to Bundi during the war for their personal safety. Rani also sent a Rakhi to Mughal Emperor Humayun, calling him a brother and asking for help. Thus her name became irrevocably linked to the festival of Raksha Bandhan.

Why I remember this part of history ? The best answer i can think of is it remind me a job given to us by society, without any reward. Why Rani Karnawati send rakhi ? When she send ? Was it the first time when she send ? Thousands  of question but history is mute. No-one really ready to tell or find the reason, still rakhi is glorified to teach us. Teach What, Why and Who ?

Lord Ram is one of the globally accepted god in Hindu religion. In Ramayana Lord Ram himself accepted Ravan as all time great scholar ( vidvan ). In short what ravan said must be having great meaning. Ravan talk about MAYA used by women to do the job. The same i can see in karnawati and humayu relation, The dark moment of history, which was never told to us. Why Karnawati send at the time, when she was in danger ? Why not next year or next to next year or previous year ? History failed to tell us if the relation was before or continue after this incident. It clear the motive behind was to get help during war by playing emotion game. History tell us she get help, but failed to tell us who paid for the same. Who lost lives in war ?

No history available which can tell me where from rakhi was started and what was real motive but today it is just an emotion game to get free bodyguard so that when time come there will be a person to die in exchange.

Its time to wake-up, we are not toys to play with emotion. Fight but for you and your own right to live. You are not here to die for someone else. Demand of equity (or greater) is on rise, still some females want someone to die for them, why ? Rakshabandan is nothing but a way to GLORIFIED the victims. Its great threat to equality.

RAKSHABANDAN is threat on EQUALITY.




This forced equality doesn't stop, thousands example can be seen in daily life :
  1. MALE paying bills in hotel
  2. MALE draging punchered bike on ROAD
  3. MALE droping their seat so that able FEMALE can sit
  4.  
  5.  
  6. List is endless 



Gursharn Singh
gursharn76@gmail.com
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
www.daman4men.in


Monday, 4 August 2014

ROCKET SCIENCE BEHIND RAPE - 001

In Sara kingdom one day a couple was presented in front of king with the allegations that they have physical relation which is not acceptable by citizens of sara as well as by Law. This was a strange case in front of king and he was not able to take decision who is really responsible, the boy or girl. Finally king decided to send the boy out of city to break the relation. Yes king succeed in breaking relation but was it justice served or it was an act to promote injustice (RAGA a collection of short stories).


Many time, many talk about legal and social facts of rape. Many ask for tough law and capital punishment for rapist. Do they really Understand what is rape. Recently I asked from 10 different people if they know which IPC applicable in rape cases and if they can define IPC 376. Unfortunately out of 10, 7 even failed to tell which IPC applicable and only one was able to tell what is IPC 376. And the dark side is out of 10, 6 demanded a tough law.

Scientifically Rape is a kind of sexual intercourse or sexual penetration against individuals without his/her consent. The act may be carried out by physical force or when a person in incapable of giving consent. Scientifically Rape can be classified as :
  1. Of Female
    • By Male (F-M) - This is what in Indian society considered as Rape.
    • By Female (F-F) - Normally termed as Lesbian Rape.
  2. Of Male
    • By Female (M-F) - Indian Society completely deny from this type.
    • By male (M-M) - Indian society still don't accept such rape.
Scientifically rape is considered as PENETRATION but in general rape is accepted as VAGINAL penetration, and that is where, it become as issue of GENDER and people start considering RAPE as CRIME AGAINST WOMEN.

A few ready to accept all four kind of Rape still they consider the first type (F-M) as the most common type. But truth and statistics don't support such believes. At national level statistics not available so we need to look at international level.

CDC study reveal the following facts :
  • F-M :: 20 %
  • M-F :: 4.8 %
  • M-M :: 1 out of 71
  • F-F ::
These statistics  shows although F-M rape are higher then other types still rest can't be ignored, specifically M-F. According to the U.S. Department of Justice, more men are raped in the U.S. than women, according to figures that include sexual abuse in prisons.

In India society consider F-M rape as real rape rest they deny without any reason or survey. Although Indian society & Indian Law consider F-M rape as rape still there are many reports in which male were raped by females.

A Few month back a boy was kidnapped by a group of females for their physical needs, that also is rape but legally justice is denied because IPC 376 applicable on F-M rape.

There are many such cases, unfortunately not only Indian society buy Law Makers also mute. One of the common logic behind this behaviour is M-F rape are rare in India. Although there is no study which show this as fact, still is not this JUSTICE DENIED.

In past few year physical relation between Boy & Girl below 18 year also termed as Rape, without knowing the fact that both were agree. Who is really responsible for such act boy or girl ? 15 year boy has relation with 15 year girl, who is really responsible ? Indian society and Indian Law only consider boy as rapist. Why ? Is not society declaring that girls are immature in 15 year age but boys are mature enough ? If both are equal in society and Law then how only one can be punished by an act of two ?






CONTINUE .....


Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
www.daman4men.in