Thursday 19 February 2015

RAPE vs PROSTITUTION

    Before coming to the point i would like to share a few stories. These stories are inspired from real life incidents :

    First : One Lady working as Assistant Prof. in a college. She wanted to be Prof. and to fulfill her desire she made a deal with chairmen. According to deal chairmen will promote her at the cost of one night with the lady. The lady fulfilled his demand but chairmen fail. In couple of days the chairmen is arrested for Rape in IPC 376.

    Second : A college student is not doing well in science practicals and she may fail. She approach to the prof and as a final deal the prof get one night with student and in return prof will clear her practical exam. She did her part while prof fail to do so. After result the prof is arrested for Rape in IPC 376.

    Third : Two friends (M & F) visit a hotel for dinner. After dinner both suppose to come back. But after dinner both drink and at place of going home they enter in hotel room. Next day the boy is arrested for Rape in IPC 376.

    All three incidents are fictitious but similar incidents we can read in news articles almost everyday. Different people may have different view about these incidents and they have right but i would suggest to think logically not just morally.

    All three incidents have one thing common either a deal between two parties or consent. First two cases there is deal and the only issue is second party fail. Its nowhere a matter of Rape. Its a matter of cheating. Even if we think deeply its a matter of prostitution, here lady approach to Mr. X and served her body for something. Mr. X agree for the that something but failed reason can be any. Its clear case of either cheating or prostitution nowhere it is Rape.

    The third incident both are drunk, but both agree for the physical relation. In such cases the most common logic used is the Lady not in fit condition for consent. I am saying the same apply on boy also. He is also drunk and not is fit condition. If we ready to accept one step further the question rise why he or she drink when they can't decide what is right or wrong. Even if they drink and made physical relation, even if I feel bad after that it is my moral duty to accept the fault at place of blaming opposite party.

    In short all three cases are booked in Rape (IPC 376) but in reality none of them are part of Rape, they are either deal or consent. I would say they should be booked either for cheating or prostitution not for Rape.

    Here people start thinking from moral, social .... point of view. They start thinking once physical relation is made the bond if for life. What society will think .... bla bla bla. many will rise the question on male that they cross their boundaries, I would say not only male but female also crossed. Ass. Prof & Female Student & Female Friend all were having choice to say no but they said Yes and responsibility can't be on Male partner. Although I am not saying still if we assume Mr. X crossed his boundaries, we are more the 70 crore how we can expect from all to be perfectly moral ?

    But my point is time has changed does not matter if we are ready to change or not. Today most of Boy & Girls enjoy the physical relation before marriage even in most cases during college and in some cases during school, If parents know or not is different matter. Today if any male think he will get a Virgin girl in marriage or Girl think she will get inexperienced Male partner, both going to be dis pointed. Best would be start think as per the requirement of time and stop such FakeCases that not only will help us but society too.

Accept the Fault at place of finding Mr X. to blame.



---
Dr. Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
gursharn76@gmail.com

Saturday 14 February 2015

VALENTINE DAY

VALENTINE DAY


    Most of us familiar with the day, if not let me remind today is 14 Feb and every 14 Feb is celebrated as VALENTINE DAY.

    St. Valentine's Day began as a liturgical celebration one or more early Christian saints named Valentinus. Several martyrdom stories were invented for the various Valentines that belonged to February 14, and added to later martyrologies. A popular hagiographical account of Saint Valentine of Rome states that he was imprisoned for performing weddings for soldiers who were forbidden to marry and for ministering to Christians, who were persecuted under the Roman Empire. According to legend, during his imprisonment, he healed the daughter of his jailer, Asterius. An embellishment to this story states that before his execution he wrote her a letter signed "Your Valentine" as a farewell.

    Reason behind the celebration can be any, but the truth is it is celebrated in many countries on the globe. In India also the day is celebrated by many. At the same time many oppose too.

    Every single person has right to decide what to believe. I celebrate the day or not is different issue but I am not against the celebration. My worry is about the day are if we are ready or not.

    V Day is normally considered as the of Love Declaration Day, but question is are we teaching our kids what is love and more specifically what is meaning of Love ? In foreign countries where parents give freedom to their kids about their life, they learn about outer world from childhood. Here in India kids are almost locked within family, they even don't know how to travel alone and safely, how we can expect them to choose a right love partner. Result such relation are short and sometime violent too. Because of unprepared mind most of the time such short relations are not accepted by kids and they try to force the partner for continuing such broken relation. This behavior is seen in both GENDER. Many time boys and girls use ACID to force and many time they use RAPE Law as tool (specifically girls). The same thing also can be seen in Marriage too, where girls try to save relation by misusing IPC 498A (anti dowry law). Here in India not only the kids but their parents are also not ready for a broken relation, they think a relation is for Life, and they try and use every available weapon. Result more then 98 % dowry cases, more then 70 % Rape cases, and most Domestic Violence Cases .... . .are fake.

    I am defiantly against Valentine Day but i would advice to celebrate the day only if we are ready to accept the breaking of relation.  Otherwise the day has nothing for us, specifically for men because here Law is very biased and will be used against men.



---
Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
gursharn76@gmail.com 

 

NO MEN'S LAND

        15 year old kid traveling from his home town to nearby city by Bus. Although 5 hour journey itself has many moment but what I remember is Bus. As the journey is not too long and no reservation is needed. Anyone can buy ticket and can sit on available seat. What I remember is expectation of getting front seat even, at the cost of hours waiting at station. What is special in front seat, why every kid wanted to grab it, why window seat is specific, what is charm their. Today I am 40 year old still my charm for front seat continue. If I am not wrong the same apply for most of us.


         My concern is not about the question why ? But my interest is why I should drop the charm for something ? Even if that something is women safety or women empowerment ?

         The question rise because one of near dear friend said the front half of public transport or bus must be reserved for women for their safety. Why ? Every statistics or survey shown men's life has more danger then women. Every record show crime against men is at wide scale compare then crime against women. NCRB data confirm these views. Here I am not talking about Domestic Violence, not because I am not interested but it is because only one sided data available. In India there is no Law or reports which collect Domestic Violence against men but there is a Law which collect DV against women, still unauthorized survey confirm DV against men is also at the same level even in many condition more the women.

         Under those circumstances the question of women safty itself is questionable, but my concern is not about anyone safty but i have concern about why should I sit at back seat, why should i drop my right for anyone, why it is my responsibility to suffer for anyone ? Why should I travell without any comfort when I am paying the same or more (in many cases women get concession).

         If anyone feel unsafe in unsafe world it is his or her duty to understand his or her limits and respond accordingly. We can't provide safety when world itself is unsafe. SORRY.

        

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Gursharn Singh
DAMAN WELFARE SOCIETY
gursharn76@gmail.com